Stop Panicking, Keep Stirring

Ch. 1 from Amber O’Brien’s Book, Love. Always. Wins.

~~Sometimes love knows exactly what we need~~

The pulsing, whirling sounds of helicopter propellers vibrated above my head while my panicked legs pumped in the chilly preseason Atlantic Ocean and my shivering arms held onto my capsized

elliptical paddle board.

Burrrroooom, ticka-ticka-ticka! Burrrooom, burrrooom, ticka-ticka-ticka!

“Lord, I don’t need a helicopter,” I screeched into the wind. “Just send me a motorboat. I don’t need a helicopter.”

The bright red Coast Guard rescue vehicle circled overhead, and I waved back at the pilot.

The loud motor and choppy propeller, ticka-ticka-ticka, sound WAS NOT music to my ears because of my dread of having to awkwardly climb aboard a hanging ladder —especially in front of a crowd of people. Weariness zapped almost all my strength and I couldn’t imagine holding on, so I continued to plead against the helicopter.

Glancing at the shore, I noticed numerous rescue vehicles, including an ambulance, a police car, and even a fire truck. A crowd of people gathered about them, and I knew they had the same thought that I did: What in the world is that crazy woman doing out there in the ocean by herself?

Just an hour before, I had arrived at the beach with my husband and oldest daughter before the lifeguards took their posts. For a special birthday present, Dave had bought me a new toy—a novel paddleboard with handlebars for state-of-the-art steering and stair-stepper like pedals for advanced control. What we didn’t know at the time was that, in our excitement, we had tightened an important screw and dismantled the steering mechanism. (Ok. I know what you are thinking. Duh!)

I remember suggesting that we try out this new watercraft on the quieter bay nearby first (I should have gone with my gut), but when we both peered at the ocean earlier that morning, it appeared to be unusually calm and inviting.

Excited to try out the new gift, Dave pushed me towards the horizon on my virgin voyage, out past the breaking waves. I stood upright and vertical, pedaling the board forward –straight out into the vast sea. After several yards, I squeezed the right handle and expected to veer right.

Nothing happened.

Instructions in the box had warned that I would need to pedal faster for the steering to engage and so I pumped my legs even faster, and squeezed the handle with all my might trying to turn so I would not continue to be going straight out to sea.

My husband yelled from the shore, “Turn! Turn!” but I moved out further away from him and my daughter on the shore.

“I AM! I AM TRYING To TURN! ” I bellowed back.

At this point, I panicked, my adrenaline increased, and my muscles tensed up. I kept thinking “What am I doing wrong?”(Remember that I didn’t know that the steering didn’t work) Thus, in my frantic panic to correct what I thought was my mistake, I moved forward faster and faster. Before I knew it, I found myself one-fourth of a mile into the deep waters of the ocean. By leaning my body weight all the way to the right, my direction turned 90 degrees so that I now became parallel with the shore. This was better than going straight out to sea, but I needed to turn 90 degrees more so I could ride back to the shore.

The current and the wind worked against me as I kept compressing the handlebars. It took all of my effort and energy just to stay upright. For ten beach blocks, my tiny board and I managed to travel parallel to the beach as my husband and my daughter, Mary, dashed along the sand as fast as they could, trying to keep up.

My heart quickened. Anxiety so overwhelmed me that instead of stopping to regroup, I scampered faster like a nervous, squeaking gerbil on a metal running wheel. Over and over, I squeezed the handlebars with all my might, “Help! Lord Jesus! Help me! Help Me!” I squealed out desperately as I pedaled on without considering a new plan.

In one final desperate attempt, I leaned my body all the way over toward the shore and then I heard a giant splash (KER-SPLOOSH!), as the board turned sideways, and flung me into the cold, dark ocean. Shocked that I was now capsized and in the freezing water, I wrapped my arms around the bobbing, overturned board, saltwater wading into my mouth, nostrils, and eyes. (I was tied with a rope around my wrist to the board so that I had no choice but to stay put).

After a minute, I kicked furiously with my feet to see if I could move myself forward and toward the shore. However, the wind was against me and the overturned board had a long handlebar underneath that was causing a drag.

Can they see me? I wondered. I worried not just for myself, but also for my husband and daughter back on the beach. I shivered, and my legs felt numb… “ Oh, I hope they are getting help,” I pleaded. The exhaustion from traveling a panicked half-mile caused my heart to continue to race as fast as my legs were trying to kick toward the shore.

That is when I heard welcome music to my ears: Sirens. Loud, echoing sirens that called out to all the volunteers on Seven Mile Island. I knew help would be arriving soon, and while I was a little embarrassed to have caused such a hullabaloo, I felt relieved that help was on the way.

Maybe a motorboat might come to my rescue, I thought.

I waited in the water and held on tight and hoped they would hurry. Finally I started to calm down enough to stop my frantic pleadings and so I could begin to finally listen.

First, my new found ears heard the burrrooom ticka-ticka-ticka, burrrrooom, and looked up to see the alarming crimson helicopter carefully making a wide circle above me. Like a hovering, rumbling, rotund mosquito that was “tsk-tsk-ing” me for my panicking and capsizing, it buzzed overhead.

To my great chagrin, I then proceeded to tell the God of the Universe exactly how He should rescue me. “Not a helicopter, Lord. Just send me a motorboat. I don’t need a helicopter.”

I then heard a calm and authoritative voice deep inside me say, “I know what you need.”

I stopped kicking and surrendered to God. A peaceful hope replaced my panic as I decided to trust that God would provide a way out and that I didn’t need to give Him suggestions. Now that I had stopped struggling, I waited with calm expectancy, curious to see what would happen next.

It must have been at least ten minutes that I clutched the board while I faced the shore, attempting to spot my husband and daughter among the spectators lining the water’s edge.

To my great delight, I suddenly heard the vroom-Vroom-VROOM sound of a powerful race car engine. Like a strong and swift eagle flying over the waves, two energetic lifeguards swooped to my rescue upon a sleek and speedy jet ski. The zippy watercraft bounced upon the waves while water spouted up and behind to form a halo of spray around the lifeguards’ athletic frames. The bright sun shone behind their calm, yet compassionate, beautiful faces and once they arrived within earshot I called out to them, “Oh thank you! You are my angels!”

Greeting me, they assessed my situation, and both men lifted me up under each of my arms until I lay face down on the back paddle of the waverunner. I noticed handlebars available for a passenger to hold onto, but to my immense relief, they seemed to recognize my weariness and that I wouldn’t be able to hold on by myself for the trip back to shore. As a result, one of the kind lifeguards accompanied me on the back of the jet ski.

Soon I heard the revving up of the engine and the vroom-Vroom-VROOM as we rose up and glided over the ocean waves like a mother eagle who carries her young on her back and lifts them away from danger.

Each time we bounded over a wave, we slid, but the lifeguard recentered me and I giggled at each unexpected rescue. His warm and strong body secured me to the back paddle, and I smiled as giant splashes of salty water rained down and we raced to safety.

We soared over the finish line and landed at the edge of the shore.

Emergency responders approached while spectators clapped, smiled, and laughed. The brouhaha ended, and my husband and daughter ran up to

embrace me, along with two of the paramedics. A warm blanket wrapped my shoulders, and the cold numbness began to melt away.

You were right, God, I inwardly reflected. You knew just what I needed.

* * *

Keep Stirring

~~Sometimes love needs time to simmer~~

I almost gave up.

Maybe I didn’t follow the directions correctly. The still hard, grainy arborio rice, the main ingredient of a mushroom risotto dish, only left a stale, bitter taste when I tested it.

Ten more minutes passed after the recipe’s instructions for when it should have been done, and I was still stirring.

The goal for this unique rice would be, “Al Dente,” which means soft on the outside, but firm in the middle. (Think of Goldilocks who had to find the porridge that was, “just right.”)

My arm felt heavy as I continued to stir the mushroom risotto well past the 25 minutes promised in the recipe. The secret was to slowly add the boiling stock one ladle at a time, and to keep stirring. And stirring. And stirring.

If I left it for even a minute, then I might miss the “just right” moment.

My hungry husband entered the kitchen to check on my progress. As the

primary chef of the family, he offered me the relief I’d been hoping for, and took over my position.

In tiny amounts, he added water, gently stirred, and tasted some more. After ten more minutes of, “long-suffering,” the risotto transformed into Al Dente. The desire that I had thought might never, ever happen, finally did.

At dinner, the rice melted soft and creamy on my tongue. It seemed like rich velvety pasta that relaxed in my mouth, like when Goldilocks found just the right bed. At the same time, its tender form had retained its firmness so that it was not mushy. Each morsel, so distinct.

The flavors of mushroom and chicken stock blended together with true perfection.

Worth. The. Wait. Perhaps… some of the important matters in life might take the longest time.

What are you waiting for, sweet one, and where do you need a breakthrough?

Maybe it’s an old friend who has grown distant because of a misunderstanding. Maybe it’s a marriage that has turned cold and silent. Maybe you are experiencing sorrow because of the stony disposition of one of your children.

Oh, Dear Sweet Sister… your loved one’s heart is like the risotto rice kernel that is still in need of warmth, attention, and stirring. Keep standing, and keep adding the liquid of love and kindness. With patience, keep praying.

Ask God for the help you need to not give up. The hard shell of your loved one’s heart will eventually become soft. Remember, God yearns for unity and reconciliation, too. In fact, he loves your family and friends a trillion times more than you do.

Never leave the stove, Dear Sweet Sister, because at any moment you might gain a glimpse at the work that God is doing, —softening, restoring, and reconciling the relationship between them and God, and them and you.

Ask a trusted sister to stir with you. We sisters need each other to help in the kitchen of life.

The first ingredient in the recipe of love is patience. Additional ingredients are listed in I Corinthians 13:4-8, and include these: Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres…

Love. Always. Wins.

* * *

Love. Always. Wins.

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Always Wins,

Come to The Well, again and again, Fill up to the brim with all that’s true,

He came to restore, make All things New, Oh my sweet friend, True Love Always Wins.

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Never Fails, Once we sat helpless in death-rows jail, God’s red love lavished to set us free, Long-suffering turns the prison door key,

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Never Fails.

Chorus:

True love is bloody, and sometimes it hurts, True love kneels down, and then takes off His shirt,

Love washes our feet and seeks all to Save, Love always wins, for He conquered the Grave.

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Always Wins, Love covers the ugliest of sins,

Pull out by the root your bitterness, Pay forward God’s undeserved forgiveness,

Oh my sweet friend, True Love ALWAYS Wins.

* * *

Discussion questions for those that want to delve deeper:

  1. Like a panicked hamster, the author kept pedaling. Are you stressed and running frantically, perhaps on a “mental hamster wheel?” What causes your heart and thoughts to race? What do you need rescuing from, or what do you require God’s power to rise above?
  • How can you pause your panicked pedaling? Look up Psalm 46:10. Are you making time to be still and listen to God?
  • Why is the eagle considered the ‘King of the Air?’ Look up Isaiah 40:31. Are you tired and weary? What does it mean to mount up like an eagle? (An eagle can fly up to 10,000 feet above the ground and has incredible eyesight).
  • What is your favorite dish or dessert that takes a long time to prepare?
  • Read out loud I Corinthians 13: 4-8. In God’s recipe of love, what is the first ingredient? Why would this one be first on the list?
  • Read the poem, Love. Always. Wins. What is the goal of love? Why does love sometimes hurt? Why does love always win?
  • While you wait, what can you do to soften your own heart?

* * *

Time for Dessert

Reflect on all the ways that God has been patient with you.

Love softly knocks on our hearts, and never barges in.

Love waits.

What is Sweeter than Revenge?

Ouch. To be human and in relationship means that others will disappoint us. Sometimes it means they will hurt our feelings or worse betray us.

What is your response when others hurt you? To respond in anger? to withdraw? to give the silent treatment?

While I wrote the theme poem for my book Love. Always. Wins., I pondered the time Jesus got down on his knees and carefully and lovingly washed the feet of Judas; the one who would soon betray him for 30 pieces of silver. He didn’t skip Judas, even though Jesus knew (because He is God, He Knew what was going to happen in the future) that Judas would later betray Him publicly with a kiss of death.

Surprisingly, Jesus didn’t skip Judas, but instead Jesus became like a servant and washed and dried the feet of His future enemy while he did the same for those that loved and adored Him. He treated them all the same and lovingly made sure they were prepared for the revealing at this last Passover supper when Jesus would confirm that He was going to be the eternal, perfect, sacrificial lamb.

How could Jesus do this?

Jesus knew that no person could prevent God’s perfect plan. He did not have to fear what Judas would do, for He knew that no person could ever prevent God’s great plan and will for Him. In fact Judas’ betrayal was part of the plan.

What was Jesus response to Judas? Love. His role was to Love…………. for God is Love.

Why did He do this?

Perhaps one part of why He did this was to model for us what we should do when others hurt us. Jesus knew that His followers would also have frienemies and He promised to pray for us. And He gave us this beautiful example of how to live free of bitterness and resentment. As disciples of Him, we are to imitate Jesus in every tough and messy situation. We can let go of our anger and focus on the truth that No person in your life or mine can prevent God’s wonderful, fruitful plan for us.

So what do we do ? We are not to “keep a record of wrongs” but to focus on the good of the person. My best piece of practical advice is to write down Ten good things about the person. Then, ask God for help you to forgive as generously and completely as you have been forgiven by God. Pray to God to bless the one who has hurt you. Then, you will have the sweet thrill of Victory…..not the bitter taste of resentment and revenge.

Love.Always.Wins

Oh my sweet friend

True Love Always Wins,

Come to The Well, again and again,

Fill up to the brim with all that’s true,

He came to restore, make All things New,

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Always Wins.

Chorus:

True love is bloody, and sometimes it hurts,

True love kneels down, then takes off His shirt,

Love washes our feet and seeks all to save,

Love always wins, for He conquered the grave.

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Never Fails

Once we sat helpless in death-rows jail,

God’s red love lavished to set us free,

Long-suffering turns the prison door key,

Oh my sweet friend, True Love Never Fails.

chorus :

True Love is bloody and sometimes it hurts,

True Love kneels down, then takes off His shirt,

Love washes our feet and seeks all to save,

Love always wins, for He conquered the grave.

Oh my sweet friend, True Love. Always. Wins,

Love covers the ugliest of sins,

Pull out by the root your bitterness,

Pay forward God’s undeserved forgiveness,

Oh my sweet friend, True Love. ALWAYS. Wins.

Love Kit-for when your friend is hurting

Dear Sweet Sister:

Years ago, I delivered a premature baby girl named Megan, who only lived 40 days in the NICU. I was so weak with grief that I didn’t have the energy to search my Bible for comforting and helpful verses.

But:) ………..I had a dear friend, who picked Bible verses and attached objects to these verses, and these fed me like precious manna from Heaven, as I would reach in the bag each day and and pull out a verse with an object attached.

After this season of grief, I have made my own “love kits” to help others who are weary with grief, recovering from an operation or facing cancer treatments.

I have found that writing out the scriptures and attaching the objects encourages me as much as the recipient. You can place these on index cards and attach the objects and place in a pretty bag. or perhaps place on sticks and put them in a flower pot. Pray for your friend and add your own favorite scriptures and ask for the Holy Spirits creativity as to what object to attach.

Love kit

I lift up my eyes to the mountain. Where does my help come from? My help come from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip-He who watches over you will not slumber; Indeed, He who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. Psalm 121-1. (wiggly eyes)

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Luke 12:6-7 (two pennies or yarn for hair)

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10. (glue sick)

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, “Do not fear; Will Help You”.   Isaiah 41:13. ( life-savor candy )

Listen to me, O house of Jacob, all the remnant of the house of Israel, you whom I have upheld since your birth, and have carried since you were born. Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46:4. ( gray yarn)

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Luke 12:6-7 (two pennies or yarn for hair)

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3 12-14  ( band aid)

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. John 3: 16-17 ( a candy mint or peppermint life-savor- you are worth a mint)

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. James 4:8.    ( a magnet- plastic letter magnet)

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. For those God foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. Romans 8:28-29. ( rubberband- be flexible while you wait)

He will cover you with His feathers; Under His wings you will find refuge;His faithfulness is a shield and rampart. Because you have made the LORD your dwelling—My refuge, the Most High—No evil will befall you,No plague will approach your tent. For He will command His angels concerning youTo guard you in all your ways. Psalm 91:1  ( feather)

Why Going to a Funeral is Better than Going to a Party: What is your Destiny?

By Amber O’Brien

“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart.”

Ecclesiastes 7:2

Most people dread going to a funeral. Oh, and I so get it. We feel awkward and helpless and we might wonder “What should I say?” and of course we naturally don’t want to see our loved ones sorrowing.  So many of us would rather not face a reminder that death exists and that our time on this earth is fleeting.

Yet, when we attend a viewing and/or funeral and embrace a loved one and say, “I am so sorry” we are bearing a part of their pain. Each person that attends gives comfort and make the load of grief a little lighter. Sacrificing your time and traveling is a way to show Love is a tangible way. One biblical definition of Love is to “Bear all things” and sharing in the sorrow of a close friend or relative is an honor and blessing.

But there is another reason why going to a funeral is so important:

Death IS our destiny.

A funeral is an opportunity to think about our own future funeral and destiny. Some questions to reflect on at a funeral include: Are you ready to face a holy God ? What type of legacy will you have left for your family? Are you building up God’s kingdom here on earth? What will you leave behind that will point generations behind you to Jesus?

Since Death is our destiny, funerals teach us so much more than any superficial party or feast ever could.

I recently attended a funeral of a soul sister whose beautiful, faithful life demonstrated the secret of a peaceful death.

Last month, I was in an airport dressing room trying on clothes, as I had some extra time before a flight, when I received a shocking text from my dear friend Heidi’s phone.

Her daughter had found her phone and wrote me, “I wanted to let you know that my mom passed away unexpectedly yesterday. She passed peacefully, but our family is very much still in shock and could use your prayers.“

My mind could not comprehend that my friend could be dead. She was not ill and just the week before was her birthday. Later, I found out that a blood clot to the heart had caused the sudden death of my friend.

After hearing from her daughter,  I scrolled back to our last conversation: After I texted her “Happy Birthday!” and I encouraged her to “keep Looking to Jesus” she shared about some up- incoming trips with her family and husband. Heidi was a homebody and so I knew that while part of her was excited about the future trips, traveling brought her anxiety too. She chose to end her text with hope that God would help her.

Always Looking to Jesus! She affirmed.

She had added the word Always and an exclamation mark followed by a prayer emoji with hearts.

The prayer emoji was my first clue of how she was dealing with her anxiety and had found inner peace.

I sat in shock on the dressing room bench and tried to comprehend this news. Her precious four children and adoring husband all now grieving a sudden heart- wrenching loss. How? Why? No!

 I responded to her daughter,  “Oh Katie!!! I am just so so so sorry. Sweet Katie…our comfort is that Your Mom knew the Lord…she is safe in His arms. 

Even though my heart hurt for her family, as I  looked back at her loving, gentle way and her final texts to me on her birthday just a week before, I felt such peace and assurance that she was now:

Looking straight into the most beautiful face in the world: The adoring and adorable face of Jesus.

This belief was confirmed in a special way at Heidi’s funeral and reception.

During the funeral each of her children shared some memories of their mom. These memories were read by her brother. He spoke as the tears flowed down his cheeks and especially struggled as his read about a dream Heidi’s youngest daughter had many years before.

Allison (Heidi’s youngest daughter) shared that she dreamed of heaven and of a house made of clouds. On the front porch were some rocking chairs. After the dream and years later, she recognized two of the men by photos later to be her mom’s deceased father and stepfather. In this dream, that God had given her 10 years before, one of the chairs was empty.  After her mom’s passing,  she knew deep in her soul that the empty chair was now occupied by her mom.

But wait ….I need to share where Heidi was found dead by her husband.

He found her in a chair.

Not just any chair. A chair in a special prayer room where Heidi would sit and pray. During the reception I had the honor and blessing of sitting in her chair with her blanket over me. (for she was often cold)

She had carefully placed favorite bible verses all around the chair. She left behind proof that she valued and believed in God’s Word.

One of her last texts included: “I love sayings, scripture and words of wisdom all around”.

Was this how she “looked to Jesus”?  Yes! I had found her secret to how to look to Jesus on this earth and to have eternal peace.

Her secret was her ‘secret prayer room’.

These are some of the scripture and inspirational quotes she put around her room:

I want to be found where she was found…for she was found surrounded with the life-giving words of the Holy Bible.

What a beautiful Way to leave this earth. Jesus came to walk her home from the chair where she would talk to Jesus and seek His face.

Now she is Always looking at the most beautiful face of Jesus.

Jesus was and IS her destiny.

A St. Patricks Day Truth Bomb: What we really should be focusing on today


by Amber O’Brien


Top o’ the morin’ to ya!

Long ago this was a common greeting in Ireland meaning “the best part of the morning to you” and you my friend would say back to me, “And the rest of the day to you”.

I am an O’Brien, which on the Emerald Isle means “House or descendant of Brian”. (Brian Boru was the High King of Ireland until 1014) Since I now hold the Irish married last name of O’Brien, I am often asked how our family celebrates St. Patty’s day. While most people drink green beer and focus on the modern symbols of leprechauns, four leaf clovers and wearing a green piece of clothing so they won’t be pinched ; my thoughts have gone deeper to an awe-filled pondering, the more I learn about the amazing real -life hero of St. Patrick.

How did he do it? I wonder.

How did St. Patrick forgive the Irish pirates that enslaved him? At age 16 he was kidnapped from Britain and taken away far from his homeland and family to a wet and chilly island called Ireland and for six years was mistreated as a slave.

But this is the part that really blows my weak and unforgiving heart and mind……..after arriving home he studies to become a priest and then travels back to share the good news to the very place where he was enslaved.

Whoa Nelly…..hold back that unicorn jumping over a 7 colored rainbow and slowly and carefully Ponder with me what appears to be humanly impossible.

So St. Patrick not only forgives the people who enslaved him, he spends 20 years traveling the island of Ireland to share the truth of how Jesus came to set them free. For the Irish people of the 5th century this included being free from druidism and all kinds of paganistic practices. He was beaten during this time and robbed and put in prison and enslaved again for 60 days yet he keep helping those that continued to try to hurt him.

How do you think he was able to forgive and then spend his life shepherding these lost people who worshiped false gods and people?

“After I arrived in Ireland, I tended sheep every day and I prayed frequently during the day. More and more the Love of God increased, and my sense of awe before God. Faith grew, and my spirit was moved, so in one day I would pray up to one hundred times and at night perhaps the same.” St. Patrick’s Confessio

He states that before he was captured, “He knew not the true God” and I believe that those years of prayer including much confessions and sweet forgiveness. In fact, he begins his autobiography as, “My name is Patrick. I am a sinner.”

After six years of working as an enslaved shepherd and most of all six years of prayerfully waiting: God spoke to Patrick in a dream, saying, “You have fasted well. Very soon you will return to your native country. Then a later voice in a dream said, “Look—your ship is ready.”

He escaped and walked 200 miles to the Irish coast, boarded a ship and eventually home to his family.

God rescued him and brought him home! One would think that would be the end of the story. But God. But God and His love for the Irish people who were involved with all types of paganism and perversions.

Patrick knew the Joy and the gift of being spiritually and physically set free and he quotes this verse that so speaks to his experience in his autobiography.

“Call on me in the day of your distress, and I will set you free and you will glorify me.” Psalm 50:15

St. Patrick knew deep in his soul that he had been forgiven much and so he wanted to extend that love, as a shepherd seeks to protect and care for his sheep.

After Patrick’s escape from slavery and reunion with his loved ones; He decides to become a priest. This took 15 long years of study and preparation. It was not until Patrick was 40 years old that he traveled back to Ireland because of another dream.

He dreamed that he was given a letter from the Irish people and he heard their voices saying, ” We beg you, holy boy, to come and walk again among us”.

Guess who is believed to be the first Irishman that St.Patrick successfully shared about the One True God to?

Milchu, a high priest of druidism, who was Patrick’s former master. (Druids believed that there were many gods and worshiped nature. Ritual Sites were built all over Ireland as they literally worshiped the sun)

Imagine Milchu’s surprise to have a former slave of his come back and not only forgive him of his own personal sins, but share how All his sins could be forgiven. Patrick came back to share the truth that there is only One True God who has three names: the father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

( Did he use a three leaf clover to teach the trinity? or is this just tradition? either way He told them about the trinity and Patrick loved his former master and the Irish people so much that he came back and walked among them)

Patrick explains:

“His (God’s) gift was that I would spend my life, if I were worthy of it, to serving them in truth and with humility to the end.”

The ripple effect of Patrick’s forgiveness and mission is astonishing. What a beautiful ripple of Love: Patrick asks God for forgiveness and is set free of sin and forms a personal relationship with the good shepherd as he himself is shepherding. Then he forgives the people who kidnapped and enslaved him, and comes to tell them how to be set free of their own sins and come to know the One True God. Then Monks who came to know the one true God through the ministry of St. Patrick, lovingly write out the Bible by hand and preserve the precious Word of God. (Book of Kells) Then these monks left the Emerald Isle to share with other European countries about how to be set free. The ripple effect of love and forgiveness continues.

Patrick’s joy shines through as he writes:

I am greatly in debt to God. He gave me such great grace, that through me, many people should be born again to God and brought to full life”.

God Gives His Best to us and so we should want to Give God our best.

Just like the Irish greeting about wishing a friend the best part of the day.

Top O’ the mornin’ to ya!


Who will you run to…when hit with the Holiday Blues ?

Hi Sweet Sister,

Are you emotional and anxious about the approaching holidays? Perhaps this will be the first Thanksgiving without a loved one present? Or you have a family member who scrapes you like sandpaper and you dread a potential conflict?

First, I want to assure you Jesus was human too and understands all the bundle of emotions that we deal with. Most of all, He showed us what to do when faced with large emotions. He came to earth to model what to do when emotions rise and we feel our eyes about to pour up and out with tears or our mouths speak words we can’t take back.

And going a little farther he fell on his face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.”

Matthew 26:39

As children we learn 4 very important words to help us to remember what to do if our clothes were to catch on fire.

“Stop, drop and roll ”.  

Fire is something that needs to be dealt with right away.  Thus, instead of running around or ignoring that one is on fire, we learn that the best course of action is to stop and drop and smother the fire by rolling on the ground.

 I have been guilty of stuffing down my emotions until I explode like popping coals on some unsuspecting family member. At first, I imagine I am being kind by letting things slide and not being honest with myself and my family about things that bother me. However, letting our emotions build inside and then like a volcano erupt out searing words of fiery ash is not fair and certainly not kind. What should we do to relieve the pressure of built-up irritations, hurts and resentment?

Jesus modeled this for us in the garden of Gethsemane. He went farther away from his disciples and then dropped to the ground and lay prostrate before His father in prayer.  He drew closer to his Father and honestly poured out all that was on his heart. Then He prayed the perfect prayer of a surrendered life, “Not as I will, but as you will.” After this agonizing time of intense prayer, Jesus was strengthened and was able to complete his mission in a calm and controlled manner.

Have you ever heard of the term “Cozy corner?” A Cozy corner is a quiet place away from the drama of others, where we can pull away and breathe deep and pray for help, strength, patience and love.

Where is your cozy corner? Or better yet, Who is your cozy corner?

You are a hiding place. You protect me from trouble; you surround me with songs of deliverance.  I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you with my eye on you.              (Psalm 32:7-8)

Having strong emotions is not wrong; emotions are not negative but can inform and teach us. However, we need the Holy spirit to help us to find healthy ways to express and release our emotions so they don’t build up and we explode or we push them so far down we become stuck.

If the emotions start to rise within in, step away from your family and spend a little time asking God for perspective and for healthy ways to express yourself. “Help, Lord” …”give me Love for so and so” , or “I am so sad with out my family member here…what can we do to honor them together?” “

So whether you are in the desert of grief over the loss of a loved one, in the storms of messy relationships or perhaps have heart-burn from making a poor choice; come away into Jesus, who promises to be our cool, refreshing hiding place.

Come away and Stop, Drop and Pray.

The Black Light Pen

by Marni Hansel

Psalm 51:7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

After ten long months of trying, Brian (our adult son with Down syndrome) has been consistently wearing his CPAP machine at night.  At first we were rewarding him with little bags of peanut M&Ms, but as his times increased he was earning meals out at restaurants.  When his doctor pointed out that these rewards were not helping him lose weight, we switched to cool gadgets as prizes.

Today, his black light pen arrived.  Amazon said it was good for finding scorpions and pet stains.  We don’t have scorpions and I didn’t really want to find pet stains, so I figured it would be fun just to shine it in a dark room and see what would glow. We went into the windowless powder room and closed the door.

Now I have never claimed to be a good housekeeper, but we do try to keep the powder room “guest-ready” at all times.  To my eyes, it was not visibly dirty.  Oh friends, the black light revealed the truth.   I don’t want to gross you out, but suffice it to say, the purple glow lit up a splatter pattern all over the wall, floor, and toilet that had me running for the bleach spray.  (Brian is absolutely delighted with this prize.)

I am the powder room.  I tidy myself up and present a “nice Christian lady” image to the people who are “guests” in my life.  I’ve gotten pretty good at appearing clean and shiny to the world.  But here’s the thing:  God sees the real me and his Word shines on my heart and reveals the truth.  I’ve got sin splattered everywhere.

It turns out I’m not the only one who’s a mess.  Whole chapters of Leviticus deal with God’s regulations for cleansing rituals.  The scriptures make it pretty clear that we are all in desperate need of purification and atonement.  In Psalm 51, David recognized his need for God to wash away the splatter made by his sin with Bathsheba.

1 Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love;

according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.

2 Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.

Leviticus 16 explains how every year on the Day of Atonement the High Priest had to make blood sacrifices of goats and calves for the sins of the people.  The problem with all those rituals is that the cleansing was temporary and needed to be repeated. The people would always commit new sins, and the animal blood did not have the power of eternal redemption.   

However, the writer of Hebrews tells us in chapter 9 that without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sin.  The solution to the problem, of course, is Jesus.  I can’t read Hebrews 9 without also hearing the voice of John the Baptist proclaim “Behold the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world!”

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11 But when Christ came as high priest … 12 He did not enter by means of the blood of goats and calves; but he entered the Most Holy Place once for all by his own blood, thus obtaining eternal redemption.

 This old hymn by Robert Lowry preaches gospel truth:

1 What can wash away my sin?

Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

What can make me whole again?

Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

Refrain:

O precious is the flow

that makes me white as snow;

no other fount I know;

nothing but the blood of Jesus.

2 For my pardon this I see:

nothing but the blood of Jesus.

For my cleansing this my plea:

nothing but the blood of Jesus. [Refrain]

3 Nothing can for sin atone:

nothing but the blood of Jesus.

Naught of good that I have done:

nothing but the blood of Jesus. [Refrain]

4 This is all my hope and peace:

nothing but the blood of Jesus.

This is all my righteousness:

nothing but the blood of Jesus. [Refrain]

Christ’s sacrifice on the cross was enough.  His blood has the power to cleanse the splatter of all of my sins – past, present, and future.  I love the lyrics to this hymn by Elvina Hall: Jesus paid it all.  All to Him I owe.  Sin had left a crimson stain.  He washed it white as snow. 

I’m ashamed to say that my powder room will be dirty again.  Now I can use Brian’s blacklight to find what needs to be thoroughly cleaned. And although God is transforming me to be more like His Son through the process of sanctification, I know that I still sin daily.  I need to read God’s Word, listen to the Holy Spirit, and pray for God to convict me of sin.  As He illuminates it, I will pray and repent, confident in the wonder-working power of the blood of the Lamb to wash it away.

Dear Lord, my sin is ever before you.  There is no hiding from the light of your Word.  You have searched me and have known me.  I repent and receive forgiveness through Your Son Jesus.  Create in me a clean heart.  Wash me and I will be whiter than snow.  Amen.

God Even Uses Rude People for Good

by Amber O’Brien

Look at this sweet picture! I bought it for two dollars, as I gave one dollar to a 6 year old budding artist and one to her 3 year old sister who were selling their creations on the front steps of their beach home. “Oh I love rainbows!” I told them when I spotted this one.

“Rain and sun are both needed for a rainbow” I exclaimed as I excitedly confirmed to the young artist how scientifically accurate her masterpiece that includes piercing sharp raindrops falling while the smiling sun shines above the rainbow.

Also, most encouraging to me was how God orchestrated the timing and positioning so that I would walk my bicycle past their porch. (rather than ride by on the street)

Just a few moments before, as I was about to go back onto a bike path, a couple walked right in front of me without noticing or caring. I must admit that inside my head some complaining occurred...wow….they are not paying attention and and blocking my way….How Rude!”

I decided to take a detour and to walk the bike on a sidewalk for a bit until the next intersection and that is when I noticed two young girls selling their wares. “Do you have any money?” the older girl bluntly asked causing her mom and I to laugh. I assured her that I did, as I had a few dollar bills ready in my pocket after visiting a local bakery. I oohhhed and ahhhed over the pictures and did my best to encourage the sisters and their proud momma.

Voila, a God-incidence in the making because I was nudged onto a different path.

If not for those two people walking in front of me and pushing me to walk my bike further, I would have missed this God-ordained interaction. When they thanked me for the payment, I reminded them of who the money was really from, stating “my money is God’s money, so this is from God”.

As I put the drawing in my basket, I rode off saying, “God loves you all so much”.

So what is the rain in your life my friend? Most likely yours is a bigger storm than rude people. There are storms happening all over. I have people in my life who are grieving the sudden death of a loved one and are walking around with wounded souls and torn hearts. I know of recent medical diagnoses that seem hopeless from the worlds perspective. Perhaps you have loved ones who are not speaking and the division is affecting the entire family. I so wish I could make everything all better for you, my sister. Just like you, I wish that I could heal all grieving hearts, bodies and relationships.

But while I can’t take away the rain and for some reason God hasn’t, ( yet…for we know that All wounds will be healed in Heaven) I did want to remind you of an important Truth:

God works All things out for good. All things. Not just some things or some of the time. All. things. All. of. the. time.

For we know that in All things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

Our God is like a masterful conductor who is weaving all the instrument notes together to create a beautiful symphony. Like using rude people to get us where we need to be. Sometimes He uses wounded hearts and broken bodies to humble us and lead us closer to Him. I look back over the rainy times in my life, and those were when I clung to Jesus harder and His word spoke to me most vividly. Looking back, these gloomy, stormy times helped me to be more sensitive to others, deepened my relationship with Jesus and drew me closer to some God-appointed people on my un-planned rainy path.

I have found that journaling is such a great way to process and release the many emotions and questions that occur when we are pushed off our paths. So I encourage you to find a notebook and let the cleansing tears fall as you write down your losses and your future fears. Let your anger out as you write out your hurt and disappointment. (stuffing emotions down inside can cause anger, resentment and depression) So let. it. all. out. my friend.

After I let out all my thoughts and emotions through journaling, then I wait and listen and look in the Bible for answers. I also always end my time filling up with refreshing truth and thanksgiving. I write out 3 good things (gratitudes) that God has done or given me and three characteristics of God. Such as: God is good, God is Love, and God is in control.

God is still on His throne my friend. He is still working All things out for good for you and your family and most of all His Kingdom. He is with you in the storm, shining through your tears.

“I wrote a poem about rainbows”, I told the mom and girls. “When you see a rainbow it is a kiss from God reminding you that He is with you”

He is with you my friend and He promises that He is going to use All things in your life for good. (He’s got the long game ) God promises to turn this detour into good. Trust in the Rainbow maker.

The toughest thing I have ever written or presented: In honor of Steve Narup

(the son of our dear former neighbors completed suicide and I was given the honor of speaking at his celebration of life. Oh how I love Steve who is now “healed in heaven”, his mom and dad, brother and sister so much. As I wrote and painfully delivered these words my heart was feeling the great heartache of all involved. yet………

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope. Thessalonians 4:13-14

I feel so connected to the Narup family and to Steve for our families have shared so many highs and lows together. For over 12 years the Narups lived next door to my young family in Country walk community and we literally shared a backyard. A rainbow playground set became the kids meeting place as well as the court behind our homes. My three children and Stef. Steve and Jon and the other neighborhood children built forts on that Rainbow jungle gym. They played Red Rover, kick the can, dodge ball and so many fun outside games. The hill connecting the Narup home and our OBrien home became the perfect sledding area as the children held onto each other and laughed and shouted as they raced down the hill together. They laughed and played and sometimes squabbled. Most times, they were more like siblings than neighbors. Since my children were younger and needed more supervision, I was often outside and sometimes would guide them with conflict resolution. OK so What happened ?  so What should you have done? What should you do now? You could say you’re sorry and that you’ll never do that again….ok now its your turn ….you can Say I forgive you and both of you hug or shake hands ….now go on and play and  never bring up what happened again.  The children would say they were sorry and forgive so quickly and completely and then proceed to play together as if the offence never happened……you know I think that might be one of the reasons why it says in the Bible that we must be like little children to enter the Kingdom of God.

Steve had such a kind heart and definitely took on a big brother role with the younger children. During my children’s birthday parties, sometimes he would help led a game station, I watched as Steve patiently helped and encouraged the younger children and then proudly give then a prize. Later, I watched that same kind and gentle heart grow even larger as he so enjoyed being a dad to his daughter Madison.  He was the middle child who so adored His older beautiful and vivacious sister Stef and so cherished his younger brother Jon who is so bright and creative.   He was so loved and cared for by his mom and dad who faithfully supported him as he grew and gained confidence socially and in his career. I could tell Steve was both an observer and a deep thinker. Three years ago he sent me one of the kindest birthday messages I have ever received. In it,  he thanked me for my role in his life and his family and then he told me to “stay on the path”.  I am still so touched every time I think about it:  for he reached out to me with gratitude and encouraged me to stay on the narrow path…even though he himself was struggling and searching for his own path.

On Easter Day, he used up some of his last bit of energy to get to church and say He was sorry for his sins and receive the cleansing forgiveness of the sacrament of baptism. He publicly chose to be a follower of Jesus Christ who is the Way, the truth and the Life. He chose the path that leads to everlasting life.

I was recently reminded of the story of the two men who were crucified on either side of Jesus.

One of the men was an observer and a deep thinker and recognized Who Jesus was and despite being in great pain turned to Jesus. He said, “remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

And Jesus replied, “I assure you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

So this late convert who made the good choice…who chose to turn to Jesus while suffering, still physically died that bittersweet day.

He was not immediately rescued, and angels didn’t come to remove him from the cross that he bore.

But we know from God’s word that the man was spiritually reborn the moment that he turned to Jesus. He was completely forgiven, his wounds are now healed in heaven and he is suffering no longer.

And we trust that Steve is completely forgiven, Steve’s wounds are Healed in heaven and Steve is suffering no longer.

For God so loved Steve that He gave His only begotten Son Jesus, that if Steve believes in Him, He should Not perish but have everlasting life. 

(for those of you who are hurting now with a broken heart and feeling left behind and perhaps angry or  confused by it all ….. I believe Steve would say to you, “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. Will you please forgive me? “

And for those of you who, like me, feel a heavy weight of guilt and wish that you had done more for Steve or tried harder or perhaps you left some words unsaid, I believe Steve would say to you and me , “I forgive you, I always knew that you loved me. I love you and I am praying for you. I am praying that you will use every bit of energy that you have to find the path. For only God’s love can heal a broken heart.

And for those that have already found the One who is the Way and the truth and the Life …I believe Steve is now praying and patiently encouraging us as he echos out what all the angels and saints around God’s throne are saying as they are cheering us on:  keep going forward, look upward   ….. .and  Stay on the path!!!!!! )

               

Bit by Bit

by Amber O’Brien

Wealth gained hastily will dwindle,
    but whoever gathers little by little will increase it. Proverbs 13:11 (ESV)

First, excitement.

At the base of the mountain, staring upward at the 600 concrete steps, the task of climbing seemed like a fun adventure in the cool of the morning.

However, the steep incline soon challenged my husband and I, and our steps slowed after 100 as our hearts and breathing increased. Oh my! I thought, 500 steps still to go.

Little platforms lined the steps and so we stopped for a break, eating juicy, purple grapes while taking in the increasing view. How amazing that after a short rest, we had a burst of energy to go up 100 more steps.

So, step by step, little by little, we slowly climbed up the mountain. Taking breaks. Replenishing our bodies. Enjoying each small goal along the way.  The renewed energy after a time of rest always surprised and encouraged me.

Finally, we reached the summit and were rewarded with spectacular 360-degree views. The joy of accomplishment resulted in big smiles and raised arms for the breathtaking photos. The victory of reaching our goal was worth every step as we bounded down the mountain with great ease.

This recent hiking trip with my husband and business partner reminded me of how in a similar way we have through the decades built up our family and business. We started with excitement, but the demands of raising children and growing a thriving business were challenging. I confess that there were times I wanted to quit or run away to an island in the early stages of both callings.

But then we learned to instead of quitting, to bit by bit, step by step, do a little each day. A wise woman once said to me, “Our lives are an accumulation of all the little choices we make along the way”.

Some good choices included taking intentional breaks along the way. Scheduled date nights on the calendar. Sunday family worship. Business lunches and longer retreats to rest, replenish, and regroup.

When we stop to rest, this is often when a creative idea or solution results.

So, what is your summit my sweet sister?

Spiritual? Physical? Financial? Relational?

Write down your goal and then start breaking it “bit by bit” into smaller goals.

For example: If your goal is to increase your prayer life but you are in a very busy season of your life, instead of praying for 10 people when you wake up, perhaps make a commitment throughout the day to pray for whoever God brings in your path or to your mind. Soon, these short “in the moment” prayers will add up. Prayer by prayer, action by action, you will build up spiritual treasure.

So don’t quit, but bit by bit keep walking toward your summit. It will be worth the climb.

Lord, thank you for promising to be with me and to help me. Please open only doors that would be good long term and please close any doors that are not in your perfect will. Please give me wisdom on the best way to care for my body, mind, and soul and show me how to take healthy breaks and enjoy the people and the scenery you have laid in my path.

In Jesus’ Name, amen

For Deeper Study

Matthew 6:19-20: “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.” (NIV)

What can you do for just 10 minutes today to help you to walk toward a little goal? What can you do for 10 seconds a day multiple times throughout your day?

I’d love to hear from you! Share your goals and thoughts in the comments.